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From: al@psivax.UUCP (Al Schwartz)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: Comedic Curses
Message-ID: <971@psivax.UUCP>
Date: Mon, 20-Jan-86 17:21:41 EST
Article-I.D.: psivax.971
Posted: Mon Jan 20 17:21:41 1986
Date-Received: Wed, 22-Jan-86 04:39:59 EST
Reply-To: al@psivax.UUCP (Al Schwartz)
Organization: Pacesetter Systems Inc., Sylmar, CA
Lines: 23

I'm sure you have all heard Johnny Carson do his Carnac routine.  A net
compilation of some of the better Carnac "answer-question" pairs has been
posted in the past.  Usually in the middle of the routine the audience will
indicate to Johnny that the routine is not that funny.  For example,
Ed McMahon will say "I hold in my hand the last envelope", at which point
the audience will cheer.  Next Johnny will retaliate with a "Comedic Curse"
such as:

"May a misguided platypus lay its eggs in your jockey shorts"

or "May a confused weightlifter clean and jerk your sister"

or "May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits"

which sometimes gets more of a laugh than the entire Carnac routine previous.

My question to you net.joke-sters out there:  What is the funniest "Comedic
Curse" you have heard?  Maybe someday we'll have a cannonical list.
--
                  Al Schwartz
                  Pacesetter Systems, Inc.,  Sylmar, CA
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