Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.2 9/5/84; site ncs-med.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!burl!ulysses!mhuxr!mhuxn!ihnp4!stolaf!umn-cs!ncs-med!jtm From: jtm@ncs-med.UUCP (John T. McGibbon) Newsgroups: net.jokes Subject: Insurance Form Qwotes Message-ID: <189@ncs-med.UUCP> Date: Thu, 23-Jan-86 11:33:27 EST Article-I.D.: ncs-med.189 Posted: Thu Jan 23 11:33:27 1986 Date-Received: Sat, 25-Jan-86 04:00:57 EST Reply-To: jtm@ncs-med.UUCP (J.T.) Organization: National Computer Systems, Mpls, MN Lines: 59 Summary: References: [...you sir, may eat me completely...] These have been roaming around the office for the past few weeks and I decided that most people could relate to the humor: (From a Dartnell Insurance newsletter) (A nested quote?) Collected Collisions If you've ever had a car accident and then tried to describe it in as few words as possible for the insurance forms, you'll appreciate the following descriptions as they appeared in the _Toronto_Sun_: "An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my vehicle, and vanished." "I was on the way to the doctor with rear-end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident." "The pedestrian had no idea which direction to go, so I ran over him." "I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way." "I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law, and headed over the embankment." "I had been shopping for plants and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection, a hedge sprang up, obscuring my vision." "The other car collided with mine without giving warning of his intentions." "I had been driving my car for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident." "I thought my window was down, but found out it was up when I put my hand through it." "My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle." "In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole." ------- "Gee, officer,...I THOUGHT I put the car in park..." -- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- UUCP: jtm@ncs-med -or- ...ihnp4!stolaf!umn-cs!ncs-med!jtm John T. McGibbon -jtm- (612) 830-8549 National Computer Systems > a.k.a "Mr. Mom" @ N.C.S. < Medical Systems Division > (Not Completely Sane < 5700 Green Circle Drive > and other fun acronyms) < Minnetonka, MN 55343