Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP
Posting-Version: version B 2.10.3 alpha 4/15/85; site loral.UUCP
Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!burl!ulysses!bellcore!decvax!ittatc!dcdwest!sdcsvax!sdcc3!sdcc6!loral!steve
From: steve@loral.UUCP (Stephen Newbegin)
Newsgroups: net.kids
Subject: Re: Small Children and Nightmares
Message-ID: <1013@loral.UUCP>
Date: Thu, 30-Jan-86 16:31:33 EST
Article-I.D.: loral.1013
Posted: Thu Jan 30 16:31:33 1986
Date-Received: Sat, 1-Feb-86 21:36:17 EST
References: <2845@wateng.UUCP> <765@gamma.UUCP>
Reply-To: steve@loral.UUCP (Stephen Newbegin)
Distribution: net
Organization: Loral Instrumentation, San Diego
Lines: 61
Summary: Yes, possibly a phase

In article <765@gamma.UUCP> tif@gamma.UUCP (Barbara Charles) writes:
>I'm interested to know if any parents out there have small children you have
>nightmares and are afraid to go to sleep at night.  I have a 5 year old who
>all of a sudden is afraid to go to sleep.  Every night for about 2 weeks she
>has been coming to get into bed with us.  
>Is there anyone out there who has gone through this?  Is there anything else
>I can do to make her feel secure.  Is this a passing phase that all children go
>through.  Thanks in advance for your help.
>
>            Barbara Charles

     Before I had children of my own I would observe among friends children
this same fearful stage beginning around 5 years old. I had theories that
this was somehow attributed to the fear created when I child goes to school.
It would then be reflected in the dream and sleep life. But now I have my own
kids and I am going through this now with my 5 year old son. My son is home
schooled and so has no outside fears or traumas. Formally he was fearless,
independent, and could be alone for hours like presently his two year old
sister, but now he has to have someone around(adult preferred) and will not
go to sleep without one of his parents to sleep with. If one doesn't make
too big a deal it appears all my friends kids had their fears fade away
at 7 and 8 years. Now I have done a little thought as to why children go
thru this fearful stage. Piaget theory has them going thru a very major
change of consciousness at this time. Their perception of reality is
changing(try reading some child developement stuff by Piaget). Ideas,
thoughts, fears take on very real dimensions to the child. Not that they
are not real, but they are physical and concrete to the child. Just like
primitive people do strange rituals to ward off evil spirits, I have
created our own family night time rituals. Only when mom has sung "Sleep
my child" and dad has pronounced a unique prayer will he go to sleep in
an instant. Of course dad is in bed with him and departs after he zaps
out, but if he awakes he is welcomed back in bed with his parents. If 
I child senses evil I respect it because it is very real to him and have
taught him how to avoid these forces within his mind by teaching him to
be very aware of something real to him physically like his hand and the
thoughts go away. I hope some of this has been of help because I am still
exploring all this, but believe me its not a permanent thing. Keep giving
them all your understanding, patience and love.


A
A
A
A

-- 


-------------------------------
	     Steve Newbegin   Loral Instrumentation   San Diego

    sdcc6 ---\     gould9 --\
    ihnp4 ---->-->!sdcc3 ---->--->!loral!steve  (uucp)
    sdcrdcf -/     sdcsvax -/

     At my farm I care not whether your a Communist Swine, a
Facist Pig, or a Middle-of-the-Road Hog; your arguments must
carry their own weight on my scales.