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From: abeaver@tekig5.UUCP (Annadiana Beaver)
Newsgroups: net.women,net.singles
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Beach harassment
Message-ID: <498@tekig5.UUCP>
Date: Wed, 19-Feb-86 10:50:01 EST
Article-I.D.: tekig5.498
Posted: Wed Feb 19 10:50:01 1986
Date-Received: Fri, 21-Feb-86 07:38:33 EST
References: <519@hoptoad.uucp> <130@sfsup.UUCP>
Organization: Tektronix, Beaverton OR
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Xref: watmath net.women:9153 net.singles:10358

> >  ...  When some women say ``Leave me alone.'' they mean,
> > ``buzz off, buster, I'm not interested'' -- and others mean ``if you
> > work real hard, I will be nice to you, but I'm going to make you work
> > very hard, because I am shy, or interested in having you prove yourself
> > to me or...''  It is all very unappetising.  It makes you want to stay 
> > home and hack on your editor, and give up on meeting women altogether.
> 
> Thank you, Laura!  I'm relieved to see that there is at least one woman
> in this world who is really aware of this unfortunate situation.

	Now wait a minute..  What makes you think that only one of the
	sexes is like this and that ANYONE can end up feeling this way?
	There have been several  times in my  life when  I have  taken
	refuge in my room and logged on,  simply as a distraction from
	'relationships'.
	Each of us (people) have our own idea of  'just how close'  we
	can let others get to us. It is a defence mechanism. There are
	many 'men'  as well as 'women'  who are slow  to get  into new
	relationships.

> > Most of the men which I have asked out have been
> > so overwhelmed at the ego-stroke of having *somebody else* ask *them* 
> > out that that is enough to make them accept.  Things will even out
> > over time, as more women ask more men out, but right now things are
> > pretty unbalanced.)
	There has only been once that I had had someone accept my dinner
	offer because he was flattered that someone asked him out.  It
	turned out that he was working at starting a relationship with
	another woman.  He had only accepted because of surprize.
> 
> Alas, all too true.  Consider it a challenge, ladies!  Even things up!
> See what it feels like to be told, "Sorry, not interested."
	I guess that the way that you take it depends on how well a person
	can accept the fact that we are all individuals and will do as 'we'
	feel we should.  Some people don't seem to understand that some times
	there ARE other things in life.  Each of us is the center of our own
	universe.  We each have the right to decide whether to allow another
	person to enter into that space.

> >     Try real hard
> > 	to forget the notion that if a woman rejects you it is because
> > 	you have ULTIMATE LOSER scribbled across your face in a way
> > 	only she can read.
> > Laura Creighton		

>      It isn't like it's a real accomplishment....
> Again, thanks, Laura.  You give hope to those of us who DO have "ULTIMATE
> LOSER" scribbled across our faces.  (Oops!)
> 	Marty Shannon

	And then there are those of us who are just "Incredibly Busy".
	It's not too easy to make dates if you have to get up early.
	
	     Annadiana Beaver
	     abeaver@tektronix
	     
  I took the week off to prune my roses...
  If only the snow would melt so that I'd feel more like going it....