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From: whitehur@tymix.UUCP (Pamela K. Whitehurst)
Newsgroups: net.women,net.singles
Subject: Re: career vs. relationships
Message-ID: <677@tymix.UUCP>
Date: Sun, 2-Mar-86 23:39:26 EST
Article-I.D.: tymix.677
Posted: Sun Mar  2 23:39:26 1986
Date-Received: Tue, 4-Mar-86 04:24:01 EST
References: <125@ttidcc.UUCP> <215@batcomputer.TN.CORNELL.EDU> <1951@hao.UUCP> <138@sfsup.UUCP> <1694@utah-gr.UUCP>
Reply-To: whitehur@tymix.UUCP (Pamela K. Whitehurst)
Organization: Tymnet Inc., Cupertino CA
Lines: 39
Xref: linus net.women:9095 net.singles:9580

In article <1694@utah-gr.UUCP> donn@utah-gr.UUCP writes:
>[...]
>A woman who quits school when men who are more persistent get their
>degrees; a woman who accepts a lower-paying job than a man would, as a
>nurse or an elementary school teacher or a housewife; a woman who
>settles for 'being happy' instead of 'being successful'; a woman who
>puts her livelihood in the hands of men -- such a woman is going to be
>swinging from men's chains for the rest of her life.  If the men are
>nice to her, she'll be happy pickin' cotton and singin' gospel music;
>if the men are hard on her, THERE WON'T BE A DAMNED THING SHE CAN DO
>ABOUT IT. [...]
>All of these women had accepted
>society's guff that they shouldn't have to try too hard, shouldn't
>aspire to more than the second income in a middle-class home with time
>out to raise the kids.  And what happens when they find themselves
>with three kids, no earning potential, and a husband who likes to drink
>a lot and punch them out?  What happens when they're divorced or
>widowed and forced to live on welfare?  It's a lie that women don't
>need to be independent.
>
I think there are two "lies" going around. The first you have identified:
women do not need to be able to take care of themselves.  The second is:
men should take care of women.  This particular lie causes men to
discourage women from becoming independent. If women can take care of
themselves then men can not fulfill their positions. Some men, like my
father, get uncomfortable when they realize their wife is perfectly capable
of taking care of herself. (I really do not expect anyone on this network
to claim this insecurity.)

-- 

     P. K. Whitehurst 
hplabs!oliveb!tymix!whitehur

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| General Disclaimer: The above opinions are my own and |
|             do not necessarily reflect the opinions   |
|             of McDonnell Douglas Corporation.         |
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