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From: purtell@reed.UUCP (Lady Godiva)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Re: Interesting article (actually, who pays?)
Message-ID: <2649@reed.UUCP>
Date: Mon, 3-Mar-86 16:50:00 EST
Article-I.D.: reed.2649
Posted: Mon Mar  3 16:50:00 1986
Date-Received: Thu, 6-Mar-86 03:32:12 EST
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Reply-To: purtell@reed.UUCP (Lady Godiva)
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Organization: Reed College, Portland, Oregon
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thoma@reed.UUCP (Ann Muir Thomas) queries:
> Just as a general question, what do people do when one "half" of a
> couple is A LOT more financially solvent than the other?

	Well, with very few exceptions, all of my romances and dates have
been with men who had considerably more money than I. This is partially
because I, like Ann, am a poor strugling college student. It's also
because I tend to date older (like 15 - 20 years older) men, and they
tend to have more money than my fellow college friends. (No, this is not
why I date them. ;-) ) 
	This, as you might expect, doesn't bother me in the least. But
it's not because I think it's fantastic to be able to get free meals,
gifts, trips, etc. but because I really don't care much about money. I
know that I love giving things to people, and I guess that I just expect
that when someone gives me something they're doing it because they want
to. I never expect expensive dinners, gifts, or whatever (although I
would probably be a bit ticked if my beau forgot my birthday) but I
don't feel like I owe something to someone when I am given those things.
I once dated a man who makes $180,000.00 a year, and he took me to a place
that I could have afforded to go to Dutch Treat. It wasn't that he was
cheap, he just liked the place. And that was fine with me. Even though I
knew how much he made I didn't think it was necessary for him to spend
it on me. 
	One thing that does bug the hell out of me though, that's someone
who makes a big deal out of how much he's spending on me. It's one thing
to say, "You probably shouldn't order the lobster, but anything else is
ok" or "I'm glad that you like this place, but I can't afford to come
here terribly often" but quite another thing to say "My God, I can't
believe how much this bill came to" or "I hope you appreciate this, it's
the most I've ever spent on a date". He'll be out of my life in very
short order.
	My present beau is not the richest man I've ever dated, but he is
considerably more well off than I am. Sure, I like it when he takes me
out, but I also like it when he makes dinner for me. And I enjoy just as
much, if not more so, fixing dinner for him, partially because I can't
afford to take him out very often, so it's something that I can do that
he appreciates, and partially because I'm a better cook. ;-)

	Share and enjoy -

		elizabeth g. purtell

		(Lady Godiva)