Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.2 9/18/84; site sfsup.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!burl!ulysses!mhuxr!mhuxn!mhuxm!sftig!sfsup!mjs From: mjs@sfsup.UUCP (M.J.Shannon) Newsgroups: net.women,net.singles Subject: Re: Re: Re: Beach harassment Message-ID: <130@sfsup.UUCP> Date: Sat, 15-Feb-86 18:21:55 EST Article-I.D.: sfsup.130 Posted: Sat Feb 15 18:21:55 1986 Date-Received: Sun, 16-Feb-86 07:44:39 EST References: <519@hoptoad.uucp> Organization: AT&T Information Systems, Summit N.J. Lines: 72 Xref: watmath net.women:9031 net.singles:10293 > Face > it, the world is full of lonely men who would dearly like to meet > a member of the opposite sex with whom they can get along. Remarks > like this only serves to let them know that they have to go at it > blind. ... When some women say ``Leave me alone.'' they mean, > ``buzz off, buster, I'm not interested'' -- and others mean ``if you > work real hard, I will be nice to you, but I'm going to make you work > very hard, because I am shy, or interested in having you prove yourself > to me or...'' It is all very unappetising. It makes you want to stay > home and hack on your editor, and give up on meeting women altogether. Thank you, Laura! I'm relieved to see that there is at least one woman in this world who is really aware of this unfortunate situation. > Can't you see that it is *really*, *really*, *rotten* to hand this > out to people at large? Most readers of this list (like most men, > surprise!) have no interest in harrassing women on the beach. > Meeting them, yes. Taking to them, yes. Persuing the acquaintance, > maybe. Something more than that? also maybe. But almost nobody gets up > in the morning and says ``Hey! Let's go down to the beach and harrass > some women!!'' More cheers! Ladies, this is how it really is. Yes, there are some men who have the sensitivity of a stone, but I believe the vast majority of us are real peaple with real sensitivity, just as you would have us believe all women are (they aren't, but again, I believe the vast majority ARE sensitive to others feelings). > All I can hope is that the problem is that, for all the talk of > women's liberation, the people who say such things haven't ever > taken the big step of approaching men to whom they are attracted and > waiting to see if they are going to get an ego-crushing rejection. Hear, hear! > (Which probably won't happen. Men, being well aware of this as a big > source of anxiety try to let you down gently, when they try to let > you down at all. Most of the men which I have asked out have been > so overwhelmed at the ego-stroke of having *somebody else* ask *them* > out that that is enough to make them accept. Things will even out > over time, as more women ask more men out, but right now things are > pretty unbalanced.) Alas, all too true. Consider it a challenge, ladies! Even things up! See what it feels like to be told, "Sorry, not interested." > ps -- for any men who have managed to read this far. Try real hard > to forget the notion that if a woman rejects you it is because > you have ULTIMATE LOSER scribbled across your face in a way > only she can read. It's hard, like swallowing elephants, but > true. keep on trucking. The first ten rejections hurt like > hell. the next ten also hurt. From then on, it is not so > bad. the trick is to get this far. (Big hint -- you won't > get this far if all you do is hack on your editor...) Yes, but for many of us (yes, I include myself, if you haven't guessed by now) it is VERY hard. (I haven't tried swallowing an elephant lately, though.) The trick is indeed trying to get to the 20+ rejections category. It isn't like it's a real accomplishment.... > Laura Creighton > ihnp4!hoptoad!laura > laura@lll-crg.arpa Again, thanks, Laura. You give hope to those of us who DO have "ULTIMATE LOSER" scribbled across our faces. (Oops!) -- Marty Shannon UUCP: ihnp4!attunix!mjs Phone: +1 (201) 522 6063 Disclaimer: I speak for no one.