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From: tkoppel@udenva.UUCP (Ted Koppel)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Re: those damned men
Message-ID: <1204@udenva.UUCP>
Date: Thu, 6-Mar-86 22:44:17 EST
Article-I.D.: udenva.1204
Posted: Thu Mar  6 22:44:17 1986
Date-Received: Mon, 10-Mar-86 08:34:20 EST
References: <42200027@convex>
Reply-To: tkoppel@udenva.UUCP (Ted Koppel)
Organization: CARL -- Colorado Alliance of Research Libraries
Lines: 37

In article <42200027@convex>, ahearn@convex.UUCP claims:
-->        <somehwat abbreviated>
-->I agree with many of the recent comments regarding mens's relative
-->lack of ability to realate well with women in terms of touch and
-->emotional sensitivity.
-->It seems to me that the real questions, at least to men, are:
-->
-->1. How do you go about developing these parts of your personality?
-->
-->2. If women recognize these types of problems so consistently, why
-->   are they often unwilling to give the men they're involved with
-->   the benefit of the doubt? (My last relationship ended for precisely
-->   the reasons we're talking about here and, believe me, I could have
-->   used some more feedback.)
-->
-->3. If women have the right to expect men to learn and respect the subtleties
-->   of their natures, don't men have the right to expect the same type
-->   of understanding and willingness to learn?
-->

There's another side to the coin as well...and that is that many women
(at least the ones with whom I've had relationships) seem unable to
deal with a person who DOES have sensitivity and empathy and
understanding.  It's as if they cannot (or will not) believe that
someone can care for them in a real way, presumably because they have
been 'screwed over' so many times before. (That last phrase is just
conjecture).

A recent relationship of mine ended precisely because she could not
believe that anyone could be as caring as I had been, and she broke
off the relationship because )so she said) "It wasn't real."

Damned if you do, damned if you don't.....

-- 
       Ted Koppel : 1696 S. Mobile St. : Aurora, Colorado 80017 :
	{boulder, cires, cisden, csm9a, bilanc, hao, nbires}!udenva!tkoppel