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Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!cbosgd!hplabs!tektronix!reed!bennett
From: bennett@reed.UUCP (David B. Kane)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Second Time Relationships:  Responses
Message-ID: <2785@reed.UUCP>
Date: Thu, 13-Mar-86 23:57:01 EST
Article-I.D.: reed.2785
Posted: Thu Mar 13 23:57:01 1986
Date-Received: Sat, 15-Mar-86 19:28:37 EST
Reply-To: bennett@reed.UUCP (David B. Kane)
Distribution: net.singles
Organization: Reed College, Portland, Oregon
Lines: 55
Keywords: Background and thoughts


            In article #7459 Johan writes:

   I have done this more than once.  MY opinion is that it
was for very stupid reasons which led to the relationship not
working again.  I seem to forget all the bad aspects of past
relationships and completely ignore the fact that we were
incompatible.  I guess hindsight is only 20-20 for 
good memories.  My last girlfriend and I dated for four
years.  During the last two we broke up several
times 'for good', only to come back together again.  Things
never changed.  The EXACT same arguments would pop up.
I might be bitter, but if I could give any advise to people
it would be to never say or listen to "I can change".
  I have matured and learned, however.  I know now that I
am secure enough and in enough control to see things for
what they are.  I think that is the problem with starting
a second relationship with a SO, the decisions are being
made from the heart and memory, and not common sense.
   The above are my opinions. No criticism please. Comments welcome.
-- 
                         Johan
	 {dual,lll-crg,ucbvax}!ucdavis!deneb!ccs025     uucp
           ucdavis!deneb!ccs025@ucbvax.berkley.edu      arpa
End of Quoted Material--


I would tend to agree with you.  To this day I do not think I can come
up with a rational explanation for why I am still seeing my current former-
ex-girlfriend. Several years ago I met her and started going out
with her.  After a period of time, she dumped me saying she wanted to
"experience different people".  After she "experimented", she apparently
did not find anyone she liked, so she started making overtures to me again.
(ie. wanting to go out with me, etc.)  I guess I fell for it.  What makes
this all the more incredible is that after she dumped me I had resolved
to have nothing to do with her again.  We started going out again.  I
do not really know if I am still attracted to her the way I used to be,
but still it goes on.  I guess, as Johan says, my decisions came "from
the heart and memory".   

Just thought I would share that with you, perhaps to clarify my
original posting on the subject, perhaps to get my feelings off my
chest and talk with people I cannot see.  Your comment are always
welcome.

I've been 'netting' only two days and I've loved every second of it!  
Thanks!!!
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| David B. Kane - "The Overlord"                                           |
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