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From: ajm@uvacs.UUCP (Aaron Jay Margosis)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: Re: Short answer jokes
Message-ID: <286@uvacs.UUCP>
Date: Mon, 24-Mar-86 10:10:28 EST
Article-I.D.: uvacs.286
Posted: Mon Mar 24 10:10:28 1986
Date-Received: Thu, 27-Mar-86 07:15:18 EST
References: <147@oucs.UUCP> <634@bentley.UUCP> <610@watdragon.UUCP> <269@uvacs.UUCP>
Reply-To: ajm@uvacs.UUCP (Aaron Jay Margosis)
Organization: U.Va. CS dept.  Charlottesville, VA
Lines: 95
Keywords: Dead men and babies
Summary: 

>>>>What do you call a man with no arms and no legs out in a swimming pool?
>>>>		Bob.
>>>>
>>>>What do you call a man with no arms and no legs lying in front of a door?
>>>>		Matt.
>>>>
>>>>What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging from a meat hook?
>>>>		Chuck.
>>>>
>>>>What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other?
>>>>		Eileen.
>>> 
>>>  What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, no chest?????
>>>                Dick.
>>>
>>What do you call a man with no arms, no legs and hanging on the wall ?????
>>		Art.
>>
>>How do you make a dead baby float ??
>>		Take your foot off him !!
>>
>>How do you get dead babies off your sidewalk ???
>>		Use a snow-blower !!!
>>
>>What's more fun than nailing dead babies to the wall ???
>>		Tearing them down afterwards !!!
>>
>>What do you call a dead baby with a fire-cracker in its mouth ???
>>		A baby boomer !!!
>
>What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, and a mouthful of water?
>                 John.
>
>What do you call a man with no arms and no legs who's been hanging in
>the toolshed for ten years?
>                 Rusty.
>
>A man with no arms and no legs who's guzzling mustard?
>                 Ralph.
>
>A man with no arms and no legs in your mailbox?
>                 Bill.
>
>A woman with no arms and no legs sticking in the wall?
>                 Peg.
>
>A man with no arms and no legs who stinks?
>                 Fred.
>
>A man with no arms and no legs in the street who was hit by a steamroller
>last month?
>                 Mark.
>
>COMING SOON:  HERVE VILLECHAISE JOKES!  (See if YOU can beat me to it!)
>

(See Mark above):  What's the name of the dog he was walking?
                  Spot.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs who's caught in a whirlpool?
                  Eddy.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs who's under a car?
                  Jack.

Whaddya call a man cut off just above the ankles?
                  Neil.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs who's twenty miles offshore
sucking oil up from beneath the sea floor?
                  Derek (Derrick)

What do you call an armless, legless man who's been hammered into the wall?
                  Brad.

What do you call a woman with no arms and no legs in a wine glass?
                  Sherry.

AND NOW, TO GENERATE YOUR NEWEST, MOST FAVORITE HOT FAD:
        HERVE VILLECHAISE JOKES!

Why was the character Herve played on Fantasy Island named "Tattoo"?
        Because he's ugly and fits on your arm.

What has been his primary source of income since the show ended?
        His winnings from limbo dance contests.

(anyone offended by these jokes are invited to join my guilt-support group,
 the Movement of Ugly Deformed Midgets' Empathizers Nationwide {MUDMEN} ).


                                  -- the Baboon