Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP
Posting-Version: version B 2.10.3 4.3bsd-beta 6/6/85; site sri-spam.ARPA
Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!burl!ulysses!ucbvax!nike!sri-spam!argv
From: argv@sri-spam.ARPA (AAAARRRRGGGGv)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: sixty-nine
Message-ID: <5420@sri-spam.ARPA>
Date: Fri, 28-Mar-86 04:01:25 EST
Article-I.D.: sri-spam.5420
Posted: Fri Mar 28 04:01:25 1986
Date-Received: Sun, 30-Mar-86 02:12:48 EST
Organization: SRI International, Menlo Park, CA
Lines: 58
Keywords: 69ers...



Frank, feeling rather adventuresome one fine day, decided to go to the
market place to partake in the voyeurisms that usually are prevalent in
the area around lunchtime.  He sat outside, sipping his pina colada
flavored soda while acting rather nonchalantly as he peers about himself
in a proud, but Frankish silly sort of way.  A small grin twists the
corners of his mouth. 

Then, much to his and the reader's surprise, a tall voluptuous woman
with two huge grapefruits (she had gone grocery shopping, I know what 
you were thinking...) asked our fearless hero for assistance.

"Would you assist me, you peerless zero?", she exclaimed.

"That's 'Fearless Hero'", Frank utters under his breath allowing only
you, the reader to understand. Noticing her large fruits
and their need to be supported in a more efficient manner, proceeds to
approach her. They fall from her sacks and Frank catches them cupped in
either hand.

"Why Frank you, young man. Perhaps you could help me bring them home."

"Yes, ma'am.", Frank obliges, "but, I must be home to make my bed for
company is coming tonight. "

The two leave the city's square in the middle of the downtown section
and head for the towering buildings ahead. A black limo waits outside:

"Wow, a black Limo."

The Limo goes and goes and out of town and into the country. Frank makes
silly comments on the way about having delivered newspapers in the 
general vicinity, and so on... finally, they arrive.

"We've arrived."

"I heard."

They get out of the car and enter the house.  In no time flat she has 
her blouse off and in a robe. Frank feels a little warm.

"I feel bloody HOT, not just a 'little warm'. You announcers are so.."

... and she procceeds to take him upstairs...

"How would you like to '69'?", she purrs....

Frank, unfamiliar with the term, shyly answers,

"YES!"

They go at it; they get into the traditional position and finally-----

She sighs, "Oh, that was so nice."

Frank responds frankly: "Yes, ma'am, but if you expect me to do that 68 more 
times, you're crazy."