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From: ethan@utastro.UUCP (Ethan Vishniac)
Newsgroups: net.sci,net.legal,net.med
Subject: Re: Psychic Damages
Message-ID: <596@utastro.UUCP>
Date: Wed, 2-Apr-86 09:51:54 EST
Article-I.D.: utastro.596
Posted: Wed Apr  2 09:51:54 1986
Date-Received: Sat, 12-Apr-86 22:17:32 EST
References: <12833@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU>
Organization: U. Texas, Astronomy, Austin, TX
Lines: 31
Xref: watmath net.sci:714 net.legal:3250 net.med:3730
Summary: lawsuit

In article <12833@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU>, weemba@brahms.BERKELEY.EDU (Matthew P. Wiener) writes:
> The following story is reprinted (without permission) in its
> entirety from the 29 March 1986 _San Francisco Chronicle_.
> ------------------------------------------------------------
>             PSYCHIC WINS DAMAGE AWARD FOR CAT SCAN
> 
> Philadelphia
> 
> A woman who sued her hospital and doctor on allegations that their
> treatment destroyed her psychic powers has been awarded more than
> $1 million in damages, bu a "shocked" hospital attorney said yesterday
> that he will appeal the verdict.

This is a formal notification that I intend to file a lawsuit against
all contributors to this net and the institutions that support it.
On or about January 21, 1986 I noticed that I had lost all my psychic
powers due to overexposure to random flames.  These powers included the
ability to tell which way a cockroach was going to run and the uncanny
ability to unscrew twistoff beer tops.

In view of this I think a settlement of about $100,000,000 would be fair.
Applying my remaining psychic powers to the problem I think this comes to
$1000 per reader of this message.  Please send a check or money order
immediately.  Electronic facsimiles will not be accepted.

-- 
"Ma, I've been to another      Ethan Vishniac
 planet!"                      {charm,ut-sally,ut-ngp,noao}!utastro!ethan
                               ethan@astro.UTEXAS.EDU
                               Department of Astronomy
                               University of Texas