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Path: utzoo!decvax!mcnc!rti-sel!wfi
From: wfi@rti-sel.UUCP (William Ingogly)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Re: Effects of career-location on interpersonal coherence
Message-ID: <734@rti-sel.UUCP>
Date: Mon, 24-Mar-86 10:37:02 EST
Article-I.D.: rti-sel.734
Posted: Mon Mar 24 10:37:02 1986
Date-Received: Wed, 26-Mar-86 19:25:58 EST
References: <496@ssc-bee.UUCP> <2038@peora.UUCP>
Reply-To: wfi@rti-sel.UUCP (William Ingogly)
Distribution: na
Organization: Research Triangle Institute, NC
Lines: 30
Keywords: LDRs, careers, intelligent SOs
Summary: 

In article <2038@peora.UUCP> jer@peora.UUCP (J. Eric Roskos) writes:

>... I have observed more and more of my
>professional male acquaintances getting married; and have observed with
>some interest that they often marry women who they can't seem to relate to
>on anything but an emotional level.  I find this strange, and further
>incomprehensible that anyone could maintain a relationship of many decades
>that way ...
>But then if you have this requirement, that a long-term SO should be
>someone you can relate to on an "intellectual" level, then finding such a
>person is very hard.  ...

You don't have to live in a state of constant intellectual stimulation
to be happy. I am the first person in my family to get a college degree 
and go on to graduate school. My interactions with family and friends back 
home tend to be totally nonintellectual. We have nothing at all in common
intellectually or politically. What do I get out of my decades-long 
interactions with these people? A sense of continuity. Human companionship. 
Affection. Knowing someone as well as you can know another human being after 
nearly 40 years of living.

Many 'intellectual' people I've known have lived large parts of their 
lives in the hothouse atmosphere of universities, and have been narrow 
specialists who knew little and cared less about intellectual pursuits 
outside their disciplines. This applies to people I've known in the
hard sciences, soft sciences, and the humanities; it's a narrowness of
vision and a pettiness of spirit that's sometimes bred in academia. I 
don't enjoy spending time with people like this.

                          -- Cheers, Bill Ingogly