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From: gm@trsvax
Newsgroups: net.misc
Subject: Re: the physics of dish detergent
Message-ID: <53600020@trsvax>
Date: Sat, 19-Apr-86 18:53:00 EST
Article-I.D.: trsvax.53600020
Posted: Sat Apr 19 18:53:00 1986
Date-Received: Wed, 23-Apr-86 21:49:27 EST
References: <1178@lsuc.UUCP>
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Nf-ID: #R:lsuc.UUCP:1178:trsvax:53600020:000:1937
Nf-From: trsvax!gm    Apr 19 17:53:00 1986


Mr. Bubble responds:

When using any kind of detergent in water, there is a certain probability
(3-1 on "Big Bopper" to Place in the 6th) that intense chemical and nuclear
reactions will take place between the valence electrons in the P-electron 
shell of the water molecule and the partially unfilled outer electron shell 
of the detergent molecule. This produces a rapidly spinning vortex, which in
some cases, can actually open a time-space portal to another part of the
galaxy. Depending upon what part of the galaxy these vortexes (vorTexas?) open 
to, you can acquire or loose all sorts of matter through them. This is why
you will notice that sometimes you can place a pair of socks in a washing
machine and only one sock will come out. Or you can place a pair of red
socks in, but a white and a red sock come out. 

The bubbles were invented by detergent manufacturers to "shield" the contents 
of your sink or washing machine against these portals. The larger the bubble, 
the better shield it makes. But as the bubble becomes larger, the space inside 
the bubble that it is protecting also gets larger (volume = pi * r^3), which 
makes it more and more unstable. This explains the behavior that you noticed
in case #3 (no bubbles, but it still gets clean). When you don't have any
bubbles, you will have a larger amount of these portals opening up in your
sink. Matter and energy is being transported back and forth between various 
parts of the galaxy. Sometimes it can actually open portals between your sink 
and the inside of a star, which is where it gets the energy to clean your sink.
(God knows you don't have the energy or you wouldn't be using detergent in
the first place.)


"Massbus" is a trademark of Digital Equipment Corp.
"Hasn't Scratched Yet" is a trademark of Ajax Corp. (A Beatrice Company!)
"Quarter Pounder" is a trademark of McDonald's Corp.

-----------------------------
George Moore (gm@trsvax.UUCP)