Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP
Path: utzoo!linus!axiom!adelie!ll-xn!nike!kaufman
From: kaufman@nike.uucp (Bill Kaufman)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re: A Sane Man Ponders Life's Little Mysteries
Message-ID: <602@nike.UUCP>
Date: Fri, 12-Sep-86 14:33:46 EDT
Article-I.D.: nike.602
Posted: Fri Sep 12 14:33:46 1986
Date-Received: Sun, 14-Sep-86 07:47:20 EDT
References: <317@axiom.UUCP>
Sender: usenet@nike.UUCP
Reply-To: kaufman@orion.UUCP (Bill Kaufman)
Organization: NASA Ames Research Center, Moffett Field, Calif.
Lines: 66
Keywords: How much further?

In article <317@axiom.UUCP> gts@axiom.UUCP (Guy Schafer) writes:
>Some mysteries of life:
>
>- Why does that black lace garter belt turn me on so much?

It's the way I wear it,...

>- What happended to my scissors?

Probably the same thing that happens to ballpoint pens, and socks in the
dryer.

>- How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Yeah, but, how much "up" could an,...

>- Want to go to the cape this weekend?

No, I've got plans with Oleg,...

>- Why does the ILGWU recommend Woolite?

Wouldn't you if the Woolite corp. threatened bodily harm?

>- You want hamburgers tonight?

My place or yours? (or McD.'s?)

>- Isn't that the woman who used to play Shirley on 'Laverne & Shirley?'

No, that's "Laverne".

>- If you're so smart, why don't you do it?

Yeah?  Just LET me!

>- Who's he?

An old friend of the family.

>- Why doesn't MacDonald's take American Express?

Oh!  So THAT'S why you're offering to take me out for burgers!
(Probably a stolen credit card, too!)

>- Which came first: the bacon or the eggs?

Neither.  I'm trying to stay away from cholesterol. (sp?)

>- What do you mean?

Ah,...what do YOU think I mean?

>And, of course:
>- Is nothing sacred?

Sure.  Kathy Li is.  (see net.comics)

					-Annoyingly,
					 Bilbo.
 ___________________________________________________________________________ 
/ DISCLAIMER:  If I had an opinion, do you think I'd let my employers know? \
|E-MAIL: kaufman@orion.arpa or kaufman@orion.arc.nasa.gov 		    |
|FLAMES: There are no flames.  Re-check your opinions.                      |
|QUOTE:  "Ask yourself, What would RANDOLPH SCOTT do?" - Black Bart.        |
+---------------------------------------------------------------------------+