Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP
Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!cbatt!cbosgd!ucbvax!brahms!lotto
From: lotto@brahms.BERKELEY.EDU (Ben Lotto)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Re:  Are you really bizarre?
Message-ID: <15290@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU>
Date: Fri, 15-Aug-86 15:40:48 EDT
Article-I.D.: ucbvax.15290
Posted: Fri Aug 15 15:40:48 1986
Date-Received: Sun, 17-Aug-86 08:27:37 EDT
Sender: usenet@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU
Reply-To: lotto@brahms.UUCP (Ben Lotto)
Organization: University of California, Berkeley
Lines: 48

>1)	How did the man with one red shoe eat his pizza?
To keep his pants up.

>2)	What is the holy incantation of the Pretzel Lords?  
>	(also, how is this phrase evoked?)
The squaw on the hippopotamus equals the sons of the squaws on the other
two hides.

>3)	A man is walking at a speed 3000 cubits/week down the corridor of a
>	starship (of course, relative to the front of the ship) with 
>	the ship travelling at .97843c towards the planet Skiron in the galaxy
>	of Andromeda.  Another astronaut, who is prone to mischief,
>	throws a rotted kiwi fruit at the man at a velocity of .47 
>	farads/hour in an attempt to discredit himself (farads are a 
>	valid measuring unit if you can measure the capacitance of the 
>	medium, which in this case, 12).  My question is "Who am I?"
>	I had a dream like this last week.  
Who's on first?

>4)	What is not a good thing to ask?
Last night I shot an elephant in my pajamas.

>5)	How many aardvarks does it take to get to Milwaukee?
Good evening ladies and germs.

>6)	If a president was allergic to ink, when could dimetrodons be
>	elected to congress?
Stifle it, Edith, just stifle it!

>7)	What two famous books did Larry Niven write about an actress?
How sweet it is!

>8)	If a doughnut were really a donut, how would Bob and Doug
>	McKenzie survive?
One to hold the light bulb and four to turn the ladder.

>9)	
Shoot the dog!  Shoot the dog!

>10)	Finish the following limerick:
>
>	Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.
>	Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
>	All the king's horses and all the Kings men...
I got a million of 'em!

-Ben Lotto  (ucbvax!brahms!lotto / lotto@brahms.Berkeley.EDU)
            (Dept of Mathematics, UC Berkeley, Berkeley, CA  94720)