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From: tif@lambda.UUCP (Barbara Charles)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: 1 year old sleeping problems
Message-ID: <135@lambda.UUCP>
Date: Thu, 16-Oct-86 08:44:47 EDT
Article-I.D.: lambda.135
Posted: Thu Oct 16 08:44:47 1986
Date-Received: Thu, 16-Oct-86 23:44:00 EDT
Organization: BELLCORE, Livingston, NJ
Lines: 44

>The problem:  You are lying in bed feeling safe and loved cuddling
>against the warm body of your spouse while your small child, new to
>this strange world, is waking up alone and scared and screaming for
>someone to hold him.

>The solution:  Let the kid cry it out. He will soon learn that no amount
>of crying will bring him  the confort he so desperately needs and that
>his parents, that seem so loving during the day, will desert him to suffer
>through the long night alone. He will give up trying and his parents
 >can finally get an uninterrupted nights sleep secure in each others
>arms.

>Of course another solution, the one used by most people in this world, 
>is to take the baby to bed with you.  The main objection I have seen to 
>this practice is that the child might see you having sex, but there are
>a whole lot of other nice places in the house to make love.

I agree with Jean.  I have never let my kids cry it out and I have always been
an advocate of the family bed.  Even though we had 2 bedrooms, my dauther,
who is now 6, slept with us until she was 3 years of age - my son was in a
crib in our room.  Since my son woke up constantly during the night to
breastfeed, usually every 2 hours, I would nurse him and sometimes put him
in the bed with all of us (if I didn't feel like getting up to put him back in
his crib).  We have a very big bed !!!  We moved to a new apartment when my
daughter was 4 and my son was 2 in which we which then moved them to their own
room. 

I have never had a problem with them wanting to come back to bed with us
unless they have a nightmare or are sick.  My son (now 4) likes to sleep alone
and does not sleep well unless he is in his own bed.  I was always more
concerned with their comfort and letting them know that I was there than
getting more sleep (even though I was a working mom and needed every once).
My son still wakes up at night and he always wants juice.  I now put a thermos
of juice in his room if he needs it and it is always empty in the morning.
The important thing though is not that I am getting more sleep (I still
feel tired in the morning!), but that both my children know I am there
at anytime if they need me.

My children do not cling to me - they are very independent, do great in school
and day care and are very loving kids.  I think it is worth it.


Barbara