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From: gary@ur-cvsvax.UUCP (Gary Sclar)
Newsgroups: soc.singles
Subject: Committments
Message-ID: <352@ur-cvsvax.UUCP>
Date: Fri, 26-Sep-86 13:32:18 EDT
Article-I.D.: ur-cvsva.352
Posted: Fri Sep 26 13:32:18 1986
Date-Received: Tue, 30-Sep-86 05:51:36 EDT
Distribution: net
Organization: Center for Visual Science, U. of Rochester
Lines: 28


	Recently I got involved with a woman who I shortly found out was
	involved with someone else, but in the midst of a prolonged "break
	up". I liked her but didnt want to be in the middle of this scene.
	Nevertheless, everytime I kept on trying to say "Listen, give me a
	call when you get this straightened out and I'll check you later"
	she would say "Dont leave me". She would then procede to tell me
	about all the things we would be doing were it not for her
	involvement with this other guy, and how good it was all going to
	be if I was just patient and waited for it to end. So I believed
	her and hung around and even fell in love with her. So finally the
	thing with the other guy finished. Lo' and behold she says to me "I
	want you to date other people and I want to date other people." We
	have never slept together. She has just started sleeping with yet
	another guy. Elapsed time; about 4 weeks after breakup with guy #1.
	My question is this; she claims she has never made a
	committment to me. Yet she asked me to stay with her in a situation
	where my emotions and feelings were on the line. She even talked
	about having a relationship with me after all the dust settled.
	What I wonder is do people think I have the right to make an
	emotional claim on this woman, given the circumstances (nobody has
	to tell me I was a fool; I already know that). Does my committment
	to her, which she elicited, mean that I have the right to expect a
	committment from her. Opinions and advice would be appreciated via
	mail.
	G. Sclar @ Center for Visual Science, University of Rochester 14627

	decvax/seismo/cmcl2/ihnp4!rochester!ur-cvsvax!gary