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From: faustus@ucbcad.BERKELEY.EDU (Wayne A. Christopher)
Newsgroups: soc.singles,soc.women
Subject: Re: Yale-Harvard marriage study
Message-ID: <1067@ucbcad.BERKELEY.EDU>
Date: Fri, 3-Oct-86 21:16:32 EDT
Article-I.D.: ucbcad.1067
Posted: Fri Oct  3 21:16:32 1986
Date-Received: Sat, 4-Oct-86 13:46:25 EDT
References: <14915@onfcanim.UUCP> <519@randvax.UUCP> <1158@batcomputer.TN.CORNELL.EDU>
Distribution: net
Organization: CAD Group, U.C. Berkeley
Lines: 50
Keywords: bitch, bitch, bitch
Xref: watmath soc.singles:320 soc.women:219

Maybe I haven't been reading net.singles long enough, but it's hard to
believe that this person is as much of an ogre as she seems from her
postings...

In article <1158@batcomputer.TN.CORNELL.EDU>, cheryl@batcomputer.TN.CORNELL.EDU (cheryl) writes:
> No, when he started making plans to leave, I assumed he was leaving.
> It didn't occur to me that there should be anything more to it than
> that.  The minute he started talking about going to graduate school
> somewhere else, I just figured it was over.  

Exactly what was is that happened?  Did he say one day, "Cheryl, why don't
you come with me when I go to X?"  Or did he demand that you go with you?
He was leaving anyway, so your "dumping" him doesn't seem that significant
since in this case it was equivalent to not going with him...

> He's just some guy that has taken a few more courses.  Just toodling 
> along in the right lane at 55.  What a chump.  He thought I would 
> stay behind him for eternity.  I passed him going 85.  VROOOOM!

If competition with somebody else, on the most materialistic level yet, is
the only way you can relate to somebody else, I feel sorry for you.  I would
give you credit for being independent and dealing with the problem better
than he did, but what does this have to do with your scholastic or career
sucess?

> ANY man who tries to con me with this "you follow me" routine is 
> history.  ME FIRST.  

Say you were going away and your boyfriend way staying.  Would you ever suggest
to him that he might want to go with you?  Maybe the case was a lot different
from just "suggesting", and if it was in fact a case of him demanding that
you go, you had no choice but to break up with him.  Can you clarify the
situation a bit?

> The ultimate bargaining advantage is to be willing to dump the guy.

If I were "willing to dump" anybody, I wouldn't be involved with them in the
first place.  Do you really enjoy having someone's feelings hostage to your
whims?  I understand that you don't want to feel this way yourself, but aren't
you using a double standard?

> And why PURSUE a man?  I mean, they
> have great entertainment value, but most of them can't even spell worth
> beans.

I'm glad that your attitudes aren't very common.  You seem to have quite a
warped attitude towards personal relations.  I'm just surprised that you
could get a SO in the first place.

	Wayne