Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Path: utzoo!mnetor!seismo!lll-lcc!well!ewhac From: ewhac@well.UUCP (Leo 'Bols Ewhac' Schwab) Newsgroups: comp.sys.amiga Subject: Re: Amiga advertising Message-ID: <2726@well.UUCP> Date: Sun, 8-Mar-87 04:55:29 EST Article-I.D.: well.2726 Posted: Sun Mar 8 04:55:29 1987 Date-Received: Mon, 9-Mar-87 03:31:58 EST References: <8703070956.AA24631@ingres.Berkeley.EDU> Reply-To: ewhac@well.UUCP (Leo 'Bols Ewhac' Schwab) Organization: Whole Earth 'Lectronic Link, Sausalito, CA Lines: 327 Summary: LONG but good. [ Crush, Crumble, and Chomp is a trademark of Line Eaters, Inc. ] In article <8703070956.AA24631@ingres.Berkeley.EDU> hatcher@INGRES.BERKELEY.EDU (Doug Merritt) writes: >It just occurred to me...I haven't seen any of the Amiga TV commercials >that supposedly have started being shown (nor magazine advertisements, >either, not even in the BYTE A2000 issue). I probably just don't watch >enough tv. :-) > >Does anybody out there know some time slots where I could make a point >of tuning in to see how the ads are going? If nothing else I could >time delay with my vcr. > Doug > >You can always tell the real AMIGA fanatics; they turn the sound *up* >when Amy commercials come on. Say, remember the old 7 UP commercials with >the spacy animation that everybody loved? I actually watched programs >I didn't like in order to see these commercials! Hey, Commodore, try it! >Do a contract with Aegis; have somebody use Videoscape 3D to produce >trippy animation, then use it in an Amiga commercial. Of course, you'd >risk impressing 240 million people that way... I'm SOOOO glad someone brought this up, since it gives me the PERFECT excuse to post this. On the WELL, we've had a local discussion in the Amiga conference concerning the sad state of Amiga advertising. Being the owner of a slightly deranged mind, I posted the following article to that topic. I thought it might now be of general interest. Enjoy it. BTW, if some marketroid sees this, and actually decides to produce it, please give credit where credit is due. Also, this isn't the only idea I've written up..... _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_ ________ ___ Leo L. Schwab \ /___--__ The Guy in The Cape ___ ___ /\ ---##\ ihnp4!ptsfa!well!ewhac / X \_____ | __ _---)) ..or.. / /_\-- -----+==____\ // \ _ well ---\ ___ ( o---+------------------O/ \/ \ dual ----> !unicom!ewhac \ / ___ \_ (`o ) hplabs -/ ("AE-wack") ____ \___/ \_/ Recumbent Bikes: "Work FOR? I don't work FOR The _O_n_l_y Way To Fly! anybody! I'm just having fun." _-_-_-_-_-_-_- Copy of article follows: _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_ Ok, I cooked up four formal scripts, and am posting the one I would most like to see produced. Mind you, these can be adapted for any future Amiga-type product. Regarding Perry's comment on deliberate downplay: I don't think so. I think it's just stupidity on the part of CBM. Have you seen any mass market ads for the C-64C lately? The 128? I haven't. Maybe I'm reading all the wrong magazines. Or maybe Commodore simply isn't advertising what has to be the biggest gem they've ever had. I think my ad ideas, while definitely the work of an amateur, would at least be fun to make, and I'm more than certain would be fun to watch and be effective advertising. See what you think of this. Schwab P.S: There is a copyright notice in it. This is to prevent some unscrupulous ad agency from stealing the idea and not giving credit where it is due. --------Script follows-------- Advertising for the Amiga Computer by Leo L. Schwab Copyright (C) 1987 by Leo L. Schwab. All Rights Reserved. Title: Amiga Trek (An original idea) Projected length: 90 seconds [Note: Due to copyright restrictions [by Paramount], the ad may have to be mutated a bit to prevent legal hassles.] INTERIOR SPACESHIP. WE ARE ON THE BRIDGE. SETTING IS REMINISCENT OF THE BRIDGE OF THE STARSHIP ENTERPRISE. CAPTAIN SITS IN COMMAND CHAIR. HELMSMAN AND NAVIGATOR ARE AT THEIR RESPECTIVE CONSOLES IN THE FOREGROUND. OTHERS ATTEND SURROUNDING CONSOLES IN THE BACKGROUND. HELMSMAN Completing sweep, sir. CAPTAIN Good. Come around to heading zero mark one five zero. HELMSMAN Aye aye, sir. FX OF LARGE EXPLOSION. BRIDGE ROCKS. PEOPLE THROWN ABOUT. ALL CONSOLE LIGHTS START FLICKERING ERRATICALLY. CAPTAIN CLAWS HIS WAY TO THE NAVIGATION CONSOLE. CAPTAIN WHAT HAPPENED? NAVIGATOR A Klingon vessel just fired upon us. It must have been cloaked. HELMSMAN None of the controls are responding, sir. CUT TO CLOSE UP OF CAPTAIN'S CHAIR. CAPTAIN ENTERS FRAME AND PUNCHES BUTTON ON CHAIR. CAPTAIN Damage report! SCOTTY (over intercom) Captain! That Klingon blast took out all our computers! CAPTAIN (look of controlled panic) Scotty, without those computers, we're finished! You've got to do something. SCOTTY I've got an idea, sir, but it's a slim chance.... CAPTAIN Without it, we've got no chance at all. Do it! SCOTTY Aye, sir! CUT TO INTERIOR COMPUTER ROOM. ROWS OF COMPUTER BANKS LINE THE WALL. ALL LIGHTS ARE FLASHING ERRATICALLY OR ARE TOTALLY DARK. PERHAPS A COMMODORE LOGO OBSCURELY PLACED ON THE MACHINES SOMEWHERE. CREWMEN TRY TO SERVICE THE MACHINE, WHICH SHOWS ITS APPRECIATION BY OCCASIONALLY ARCING AND PRODUCING SHOWERS OF ELECTRICAL SPARKS. CREWMEN RECOIL BUT KEEP TRYING. SCOTTY IS AT THE FAR WALL NEAR AN INTERCOM. SCOTTY Crewman! (one of the crewmen servicing the machines trots up to SCOTTY) There's an antique computer in my quarters. Bring it here! CREWMAN SCURRIES OFF OUT OF SHOT. CUT TO INTERIOR HALLWAY. CREWPEOPLE ARE RUNNING HERE, REPAIRING THERE. LIGHTS FLICKER AND DIM. A MAN WITH A CART IS AT THE REAR OF THE HALL. OUR CREWMAN EMERGES FROM THE DOOR IN THE FOREGROUND FROM THE COMPUTER ROOM. HE RUNS DOWN THE HALL AWAY FROM THE CAMERA. CREWMAN (as he runs past MAN with cart) Bring that cart! BOTH MAN AND CREWMAN RUN OUT OF SHOT AT REAR OF HALL. CUT TO INTERIOR BRIDGE. LOW SHOT OF NAVIGATION CONSOLE LOOKING TOWARDS REAR OF BRIDGE. CAPTAIN STILL IN STATE OF CONTROLLED PANIC. HELMSMAN Shields are down... NAVIGATOR Phasers inoperative. CAPTAIN Where are those computers?! CUT TO INTERIOR HALLWAY. THREE-QUARTER FRONT TWO-SHOT OF CREWMAN AND MAN RUNNING DOWN HALL. CAMERA TRUCKS TO FOLLOW. CREWPEOPLE ARE RUNNING THIS WAY AND THAT. LIGHTS STILL FLICKERING. VAGUELY MECHANICAL VOICE DRONES "RED ALERT" OVER AND OVER. CREWMAN SUDDENLY TURNS TOWARDS A DOOR; MAN FOLLOWS. CUT TO INTERIOR SCOTTY'S QUARTERS. LOW, TABLE LEVEL SHOT. AMIGA COMPUTER WITH MONITOR SITS ON THE TABLE IN THE FOREGROUND. A STACK OF LAZILY PILED 3.5 INCH DISKS IS ALSO VISIBLE. DOOR IN BACKGROUND. CAMERA IS FOCUSED ON AMIGA NAMEPLATE, DOOR IS FUZZY. DOOR OPENS, CREWMAN AND MAN RUN IN. CREWMAN PRACTICALLY THROWS THE AMIGA, MONITOR, AND DISKS ON CART. CUT BACK TO BRIDGE. CAPTAIN IN CHAIR IN FOREGROUND, COMMUNICATIONS OFFICER IN BACKGROUND. CAPTAIN TURNS TO HER. CAPTAIN Open a channel, try hailing them. COMMUNICATIONS I've tried that sir, on all frequencies. There's no response. CAPTAIN (turning back to main view screen) Scotty! CUT BACK TO HALLWAY. FULL-FRONT SHOT OF MAN AND CREWMAN RUNNING DOWN HALL WITH AMIGA IN CART. PEOPLE RUNNING, LIGHTS DIMMING. CREWMAN TURNS INTO COMPUTER ROOM DOOR. MAN FOLLOWS. CUT BACK TO INTERIOR COMPUTER ROOM. MECHANICAL VOICE STILL DRONING "RED ALERT." A TEAM OF TECHNICIANS ARE STILL WORKING ON THE MAIN COMPUTER, DOING QUICK REPATCHING. CREWMAN ENTERS FOLLOWED CLOSELY BY MAN. SCOTTY TURNS TO FACE THEM. CREWMAN IMMEDIATELY STARTS PLUGGING POWER CORDS IN. SCOTTY RIPS OFF THE EXPANSION CONNECTOR AND PLUGS IN AN EXOTIC-LOOKING INTERFACE CARD AT THE END OF A RATS NEST OF WIRES AND FIBER OPTICS (APPARENTLY SCOTTY JUST KLUDGED THIS UP). CUT BACK TO BRIDGE. SHOT OF MAIN VIEW SCREEN OVER THE SHOULDERS OF CAPTAIN, NAVIGATOR, AND HELMSMAN. SCREEN SHOWS EMPTY SPACE FOR A MOMENT, THEN A KLINGON-LIKE VEHICLE FADES IN. NAVIGATOR There it is! HELMSMAN They're maneuvering to fire! CAPTAIN (violently punches comm button) Scotty, we need those computers NOW!! CUT BACK TO COMPUTER ROOM. THREE-QUARTER SHOT OF AMIGA ON CART IN FOREGROUND, WITH RATS NEST CONNECTED TO IT. RATS NEST LEADS TO COMPUTER BANKS ON WALL. CREWMAN HOLDING MOUSE, OPERATING AMIGA. WORKBENCH SCREEN IS UP, WITH ICONS IN A WINDOW. CREWMAN POINTS AT AN ICON AND DOUBLE-CLICKS ON IT. SCOTTY IN BACKGROUND, TALKING INTO INTERCOM. SCOTTY It's coming up now, sir. Just a few more seconds... CUT BACK TO BRIDGE. LOW THREE-SHOT OF CAPTAIN AT NAV CONSOLE BETWEEN HELMSMAN AND NAVIGATOR. CAPTAIN (losing it) We haven't GOT a few seconds!! NAVIGATOR Sir! (CAPTAIN looks up) They're in position! CUT TO CLOSE-UP OF AMIGA. OUTBOARD PROFILE OF CONSTITUTION-CLASS STARSHIP APPEARS ON SCREEN (WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T HAVE THE STARFLEET TECHNICAL MANUAL? :-) ). THEN, AN INBOARD DECK DIAGRAM FILLS IN THE SHIP PROFILE. THEN, A ROUNDED ENVELOPE, REPRESENTING THE SHIELDS, SURROUNDS THE PICTURE OF THE SHIP. THEN, THE WORDS "ON LINE" APPEAR AT THE BOTTOM OF THE SCREEN. CUT TO CLOSE UP OF SCOTTY AT INTERCOM ON WALL. SCOTTY NOW SIR! CUT BACK TO PREVIOUS SHOT OF BRIDGE. HELMSMAN (in disbelief) We have shields... CAPTAIN PHASERS! FIRE! NAVIGATOR PRESSES BUTTON. APPROPRIATE SOUND FX. CUT TO SHOT OF MAIN VIEWSCREEN. PHASER BOLT HITS KLINGON VESSEL, AND EXPLODES, WITH SOUND FX. VESSEL IS NOT DESTROYED, BUT IS VISIBLY KNOCKED AROUND. CUT TO BRIDGE. THREE-QUARTER FRONT THREE-SHOT OF NAV CONSOLE. NAVIGATOR A hit! HELMSMAN They're off course... CAPTAIN (pressing buttons on console) Get us out of here! (NAVIGATOR helps him) CUT TO CLOSE-UP OF AMIGA SCREEN. THREE-D PICTURE OF SHIP ON SCREEN. X, Y, AND Z ROTATION VALUES IN CORNER. SHIP ROTATES TO NEW HEADING, UPDATING XYZ VALUES, AND STOPS. BACKGROUND SOUND FX OF SHIP PREPARING TO ENTER WARP DRIVE. THE WORDS "WARP 9" APPEAR AT THE BOTTOM OF THE SCREEN. CUT TO EXTERIOR SHIP. VISUAL FX OF SHIP ENTERING WARP DRIVE. CUT TO INTERIOR BRIDGE. WIDE THREE-QUARTER FRONT SHOT. EMOTIONAL RELIEF FROM CREW, CHEERS, ETC. CAPTAIN SINKS BACK IN CHAIR. CAPTAIN Scotty, are you there? SCOTTY (over intercom) Aye, sir. CAPTAIN How do you do it? CUT TO CLOSE UP OF SCOTTY IN COMPUTER ROOM AT INTERCOM. SCOTTY I use only the best equipment, sir. (turns to look at Amiga) CUT TO FULL SHOT OF AMIGA. MOVING STAR GRAPHIC ON SCREEN. FADE IN AMIGA LOGO AT BOTTOM OF SCREEN. HOLD FOR THREE SECONDS. FADE TO BLACK. [ Editor's note: A couple of local responses follow: ] ,E ,R0000 ,U2903,fw ,AFred Wright ,D2030424c ,T You forgot to have Scotty try to talk into the mouse :-) Actually, maybe there should be a closeup of the Enterprise's main computer, revealing the "Amiga 9000" logo (those gizmos they always stuck in the machine did look a lot like 3.5 floppies, didn't they?). Then, if you REALLY want to impress people, do the whole video ON the Amiga. BTW, I don't think you have to worry too much about copyright problems. Paramount didn't copyright much of anything in the original series. That's why they changed the uniforms in the films - to be able to make some money on product licensing. ,E ,R0000 ,U1966,pokey ,AJef Poskanzer ,D2031875f ,T I think you could cut it down to a minute and increase the impact by not showing the Amiga until the final ten seconds or so. Think of the Dr. Pepper commercials. Amiga is brought in to engineering, is hooked up, boots instantly (hah!), starts displaying trekkish stuff, cut to bridge (where monitors are showing similar displays), and Kirk is giving orders, etc.