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From: sarrel@osu-eddie.UUCP
Newsgroups: comp.sys.mac
Subject: Re: kludge
Message-ID: <3431@osu-eddie.UUCP>
Date: Mon, 13-Apr-87 01:07:25 EST
Article-I.D.: osu-eddi.3431
Posted: Mon Apr 13 01:07:25 1987
Date-Received: Tue, 14-Apr-87 00:47:31 EST
References: <200@osupyr.UUCP>
Reply-To: sarrel@osu-eddie.UUCP (Marc Sarrel)
Distribution: world
Organization: The Ohio State University, CIS Dept.
Lines: 58

I read a story somewhere that said what a kludge is.  It goes something like
this (pardon me, for I'm paraphrasing):

	Not too long ago, in the Navy, there was a Seaman who was
	famous for building Kludges.  No one was quite sure what
	a Kludge was, but all agreed that he was the best at making
	them.  Now, one day an Admiral heard of this famous Kludge-
	building sailor and decided that every ship in the Navy should
	be equipped with a kludge.  After all, what would happend if
	the Russians should build Kludges for their ships first?

	Being a military man, the first thing that the Admiral did was
	to was to get Congress to appropriate large sums of money for his
	top-secret Kludge project.  Only the President and a few select
	officials knew the details of the plan (which were few and
	far between to begin with).  Then the Admiral set the Seaman to
	work.  The Admiral offered the best military reasearch labs and
	equipment in the country, but the Seaman would have none of it.
	All the seaman wanted was a small room, some old piano wire, some
	fish hooks, chains, cable and the like.  The Admiral, although
	puzzled, granted the Seaman's request and the Seaman set to work.

	For nearly a week, the Seaman work furiously.  He barely slept and
	only came out of the room to eat and use the bathroom.  Then, on
	the seventh day, the Seaman announced that he had finished the
	prototype.  The Admiral was very excited and arranged for a
	demonstration the very next day aboard one of the Navy's 
	biggest and best ships.

	All the top Navy Brass were present for the unveiling.  They 
	waited nervously to see the Kludge in action, for by this
	time, the rumors of its capabilities and powers had grown
	almost beyond all rational belief.  Then, it was time.  The
	Seaman came out, made a short speech and then revealed his
	creation.  The crowd gasped.  None knew quite what to make
	of it.  Before them was what looked like a large ball of
	tangled wires and junk, nearly six feet accross.  It had no
	real shape, and didn't look like it was capable of doing much
	of anything.  But, the Seaman told them to wait and he
	would demonstrate.

	He rolled the Kludge off the pedestal and rolled it to the side
	of the ship where the railing had been removed.  He checked the
	distance to the water, liked his finger to test the wind direction
	and then gave the Kludge a strong, but a calculated push off the
	deck of the ship.

	It fell for what seemed like an eternity, then, as it hit the
	water, it went "KLUDGE!" and sank.  The Seaman was very pleased.

I think I read the original version in a book entitled "Tomfoolery".

Hope this explanation helps... :-)
-- 
Marc Sarrel
CIS Gradual Student			611 Harley Dr. #1
The Ohio State University		Columbus, OH  43202
..!osu-eddie!sarrel or sarrel@osu-eddie.uucp