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From: madd@bucsb.bu.edu.UUCP (Jim "Jack" Frost)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,comp.misc
Subject: Re: What the world needs now
Message-ID: <976@bucsb.bu.edu.UUCP>
Date: Tue, 19-May-87 13:46:51 EDT
Article-I.D.: bucsb.976
Posted: Tue May 19 13:46:51 1987
Date-Received: Wed, 20-May-87 05:38:19 EDT
References: <12067@topaz.rutgers.edu>
Reply-To: madd@bucsb.bu.edu.UUCP (Jim "Jack" Frost)
Organization: ODO (Organization for the Disorganization of Organization)
Lines: 48
Keywords: Originally from a friend
Xref: mnetor talk.bizarre:1827 comp.misc:542

In article <12067@topaz.rutgers.edu> trudel@topaz.rutgers.edu (Jonathan D.) writes:
>
>... is a piece of software that actually makes a computer blow up just
>like in the movies.  This is long overdue.

Indeed it is.  Now seems to be the time to announce my company's new
add-on board, available for IBM PCs (and near-clones), Apple Mac II's,
Amiga 2000s (and Amiga 1000s, but it's a box and not a card),
Commodore 64s and 128s, most S100 machines, and of course the IBM
3090.

This card, called the "Crasher", traps all errors from the above
machines and decides whether or not it's really serious.  For
not-so-serious errors, it emits a small puff of bad-smelling smoke.
More serious errors cause alarms (180Db -- we don't fool around) and
flashing lights.  For those really really serious errors, there's 2 oz
of pure trinitrous toluene (TNT, stupid) on board, which has proven by
experiment to pretty much level your computer when it goes off.


>"Lay" people are extremely
>disappointed when a program or system grinds/wheezes to a halt with some wimpy
>message like "B037X: USER ERROR IN GAPX TABLE" or "CATASTROPHIC SYSTEM FAILURE:
>BUFFER OVERFLOW INDICATOR OVERFLOW" or "Bus error - core dumped".  They want
>to see explosions!  Paper spewing out from wherever paper spews out from!
>And gicky fluid oozing out of the machinery as the entire machine room
>collapses onto itself....

How true!  And now you can.  Just order the Crasher.  Send $1,200 to:

  Frost Computer Enhancements
  75 Washington Street
  Laconia, NH  03246

For faster service, send your credit card number and shipping address
to:

   madd@bucsf.bu.edu

>Let's make computers explode in our lifetime!!!

Would you like to make some cash?  We'll pay good royalties for that
slogan....

[If you believe all of this, I have this new Hyperfast Computer System
to sell you...]

jim